Keith,
Thank you for watching over your sister. Like you, she's beautfiul. I am so honoured to be your Mom. God bless our love.

May 31, 2010

Happy day! Sophia May was born on May 27, 2010. Quite the shocker. She was born emergency c/section after decelerated heart rates. Because of my history, I was being monitored quite closely with non stress test and appointments . After helping at K’s kindergarten beach part kindergarten beach party, I met Steve for my twice weekly non stress test. This of course after I ate a hamburger and fry for lunch. Dr. Lesser noticed some decal heart rates. She went and discussed this with the perinatalogist who referred me for a contraction stress test in the labor and delivery. I was told it would take two hours, so Steve to K to work with him. While prepping for the test, I was calling my folks (who were in Washington). I was explaining to my Dad what test and why, when I noticed just a minor Braxton hick contraction with a drastic decrease in heart rate on the computer. Not trying to worry him, I said this doesn’t look good and they may have me deliver. Then two nurses (one being Sandra from our old ward) rushed in saying they were canceling the test and preparing me for a emergency c-section. Dr. Lesser who also saw it called to verify it was accurate (she was shocked that her heart rate dropped so low) and said get Steve back and prepare for emerg c-section. The nurse was to text her when Steve was within 5 minutes of the hospital. I called Steve at work and said NOW come now, they’re rushing me in for emergency c-section. He grabbed K, checked T out of school, got a neighbor to watch them until Steph could come and get them (and E from school), grabbed the cameras and was back at the hospital within 35 minutes. They had already wheeled me into the OR and was giving me the epidural when Steve came in ready for surgery. We just looked at each other with that look what on earth had happened. We said a quick prayer. While on the table, I was praying privately and had a spiritual moment that she would be coming here alive. I felt Keith saying ‘goodbye’ to her. I recalled how hard it was for me to say goodbye to Keith and Angel, and now it was there turn to say goodbye to Sophia. One day we’ll all be together. Keith taught me compassion and true mourning. Sophia taught me faith in life and hope for the future. I love being a Mom to such chosen spirits!

Back to the c/s, I had a shield, so I couldn’t see the c-section, but Steve watched as they cut me open, pulled out my uterus, Dr. other Lesser pressed down on my stomach (ooh I felt that). The anesthesiologist explained what was happening to me as he monitored my vitals (remember I had just eaten). My uterus was then incised and out came a beautiful tiny 3 lb 12 oz, 16 “ little girl. Dr. Lesser let me look at her and then was quickly handed over to the NICU staff. Being our final child, I was happy to get my tubes tied and since I was already cut open, perfect timing.

I was sent to recovery for one hour. Sophia to the NICU. She never needed oxygen. Dr. Lesser thinks the last two weeks my placenta or blood flow between me and baby was just not functioning as well and was glad they caught it….before it was too late. To think I could have lost Sophia as did Keith just tears at me. I spoke to our Bishop and told him how close we came to of loosing her. We know w/ Keith that their was a decrease in blood flow (why…we’ll never know). But she was showing the same signs. We are truly blessed with a miracle. If it wasn’t for Keith, Sophia would never have com. I am so blessed to be a Mom of two boys, two girls, and two angels!

I’m learning the pain and struggles of a NICU baby. I hate being on NICU time, but have not other choice. Yesterday, I had a remarkable nurse who just allowed me to hold Sophie for 3 hours (usually limited to 45 min). I thanked (even wrote a IMC hero card) her and explained how I haven’t wanted to hold a newborn since I lost Keith. So to sit here and hold my newborn daughter was a monumental treasure. Never did I think I’d be 37 and having my daughter 6 years after my other children. Still not sure why the grand entrance Sophie, but I know my Heavenly Father lives and hears my prayers. I’m so glad I have my children. Glad I have my Man, who is truly the best Dad and husband. He is my every other heartbeat.

Happy Memorial day.



Happy 2nd Angel Day Keith on May 4, 2010. For FHE, we had a balloon release and sung happy angel day. In love with you more and more Keith.